By Kelly


The myth that academics live in ivory towers, unshackled from the concerns of the common man, is rhetoric only voiced by those who have never entered the profession. Truth be known, it can be a hard slog. Funding is a CONSTANT concern, appreciation often scant and reward? This is ain’t the Academy Awards people.

I stumbled across a wonderful satirical commentary, recently published in The Guardian, describing a new award recognizing those of us who will never be Nobel Laureates. For the average scientist; it’s the award for nothing.

Here’s an excerpt: 

Even those outside life sciences are eligible for the pointless award. Matthew Bryson is an analyst responsible for the study and design of suspension bridges.

“It’s a good career choice in the long-term, because I can help build a bridge, and then when the money runs out suddenly I’ll have something to live under.”

“I look forward to this award, as my girlfriend is a geologist. Eight years of studying to be told by a clueless politician that she’s less valuable than a shelf stacker. She’s been quite smug about this official confirmation of how worthless she is. With this new prize, people like me can hope for the same recognition.”

You can read the full piece online at the Guardian here. And to the very clever writer, Dean Burnett, I salute you.